Lists Category

My year in times I cried

What I choose to drink doesn’t change the fact that I’ve always been a crier. It’s written in my DNA. Always has been, always will be.

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Thanks, spanx and cheesecake: An ode to November

Last November, 20 some-odd friends and I unfolded metal chairs around two beer pong tables, a snack tray and a music stand. We raised plastic cups of apple cider-sangria and cans of warm Rolling Rock while cheers-ing our inaugural Friendsgiving feast. Somewhere between (A) under-cooking the sweet potatoes with my best friend and her off-the-boat Irish mother, (B) ripping my […]

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Out of the frying pan, into the fire: A life lessons listicle

A friend recently informed me that I’ve been living below the poverty line. Since blowing through my savings in a mere two-ish years on my own, I’ve had the nice, expensive Pursian rug pulled out from underneath me. The one that paved the way for lavish, week-long music festivals and all of the bar tabs I […]

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16 New Year’s resolutions I will (probably not) keep

Last December, I vowed not to touch my friends’ tits or leave the house with wet hair. This Christmas, a good guy friend of mine walked into the woman’s bathroom at our every-week bar to find both of my tiny, un-manicured hands pressed against his girlfriend’s chest. He was looking to smoke a cigarette and we’d been in […]

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Life happens when you’re busy blogging

John Lennon (and one in five white girls’ high school yearbook) once said, “Life happens when you’re busy making other plans.” #TBH, life’s been really needy lately (like, ex girlfriend at the end of “The Fault in Our Stars” needy) but, before Kanye drops in to tell me Beyoncé had the best blog of all time, let me finish. Between […]

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10 things people have Googled to get to this blog

The internet is a scary thing. Not only is every Instagram selfie I’ve ever shamelessly posted plastered on the Google Image search attached to my name but, thanks to WordPress, I have access to an archive of search terms that — at one time or another — have led Internet users to my site. Here […]

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I want my money back: 25 songs I wish I hadn’t paid for

For as long as I can remember, I’ve had a track record of awful purchases (shout out to that $80 Urban Outfitters duvet cover I thought was a full-fledged comforter set, that copy of Spiderman 2, Tobey Maguire edition, on DVD and that full-pleather skater skirt I’ll never, ever wear). See also: every single Starbucks […]

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500(+) days of awkward: Seven years in Facebook statuses

Mazel Tav, Facebook. Today, you’re a tween. Ten years ago this week, Mark Zuckerberg launched thefacebook.com from his beer-ridden, dimly lit Harvard dorm room in a move that would permanently reshape social media (cue: “Damn, Jesse Eisenberg was a prick in that movie”) and leave all of Generation Y toggling with their privacy settings in hopes of still finding employment. […]

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“I will not touch my friends’ tits” and other New Year vows

This year, I rang in the New Year at a pub called Pour House (probably some sort of a sign). I took a weekend class on Tarentino, built a bar out of snow and saw a friend nearly break his neck expressing himself on ecstasy some Sunday afternoon. I saw Swedish House Mafia from 100 stories up at […]

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“If I die, scatter my ashes at Mad Decent Block Party”: 2013 in texts

“Currently doing snow angels in my bed to Chariot by Gavin DeGraw.” “Alive?” “O gos” “Taking that as a yes” “Alivw” “If I had a choice of you puking on my lap every morning this year rather than not being in bonerville with me I’d prab do it” “I will lick you soon.” “Oh perfect […]

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